7.20.2012

PLOG (that's short for picture blog)

Long overdue pic update Dad & Baylor swimming it up
Brunch with my favorite girls & to celebrate the brief return of KP
Loving her Poppa

Baylor, prior to pooping in the pool and contaminating all the fun.
From 2012-07-14
Anyone who has ever had the opportunity to see a naked middlebrooks will recognize this very distinct rear. It is a utilitarian booty.

word to the wise

An interview with a three year old- nothing spectacular, but worth sharing for the grandparents.

7.12.2012

Mystery Solved

The conclusion of these two mysteries have brought me a feeling of utter peace and resolution.

1.  A while ago I found a round disc magnet in the tub amongst the bath toys.  (FYI- every morning it is a miracle Luke & I don't trip to our deaths on the bzillion bath toys littering the tub.)  Anyhow, this magnet freaked me out because it was a choke hazard, my son will put anything in his mouth, and magnets are especially dangerous if eaten.  I examined all the bath toys & for the life of me couldn't figure out where in the world this magnet came from.  I interrogated both Luke and Johonna. Luke professed his innocence, Jo professed her desire for strawberry yogurt.  I knew I was going to have to live with the not knowing for the rest of my life.

But sometimes unsolved mysteries are solved!  Earlier this week in the shower, while looking out for slippery foam letters and rubber ducks, I noticed that the shower liner has only TWO of THREE slim magnetic discs used to keep it stuck to the tub!!! Mystery solved, and time for a new shower liner. It was a great way to start my day.  My only regret is that no one else seems to be as satisfied by this resolution as I.

2. A few weeks ago I bought some frozen sweet potato tater tots.  I baked them on a rack on a cookie sheet (this maximizes the air flow around the tot for improved crispness).  I sprinkled them with sea salt and a dash of cinnamon sugar.  They were delightful.  Which is why the next night I decided it might be a good idea to cook the other half of the bag.  So I opened the freezer...and came up short. No sweet potato tots to be found. I pulled out the entire freezer contents and couldn't find them anywhere.  Luke got home, and was again interrogated. He promised that he did not take my tots.  This time I didn't even bother with Jo-she never shoots straight with me.  I started to doubt myself.  Had I maybe eaten the WHOLE bag of tots the night prior? I didn't think so...but I couldn't swear to it. 

Yesterday: imagine my surprise when out of hunger and boredom at my parents houses I opened their freezer for the third or fourth time (do you know that EVERY time I am in my parents house I open their fridge, freezer, and chip cupboard several times? even if i don't eat anything or i'm not hungry, i just open them to look.) I noticed MY open bag of sweet potato tots.  I nearly fell over. I asked my Dad & he said he'd been wondering how they got there.  How did my tots go from Milwaukie to Wilsonville??? I think that in a hurry to pack some frozen baby food for baylor I may have thrown my tots in the bag and sent it with luke to Wilsonville.  Or an elf moved them. I'm not sure, but I have returned them to their rightful freezer and will be consuming them in the near future.

7.10.2012

Rewind

I will write this post in reverse order of events for maximum dramatic impact.  To set expectations, let's clarify that "dramatic impact" is pretty relative.  We're not talking Grey's Anatomy season finale, more like moderately amusing commercial during Grey's Anatomy season finale.

13. My dad laughed and pointed at my suffering.
12. My dad asked what I drank from, and I told him.
11. I found a cheesecake cupcake in the fridge and ate a big bite
10. I fought back the urge to vomit while frantically looking for something to cleanse my palette
9. My gag reflex triggered, I sputtered and gagged.
8. I picked up the cup & guzzled some water
7. I saw Jo's plastic orange cup sitting on the counter, full of water
6. The pills started to dissolve a little, which is an irrational fear of mine
5. I started looking around for a cup of water
4. I gratefully accepted and popped two big pills in my mouth.
3. My dad offered me two excedrin that he says are now only available on the black market (something about manufacturing issues leading to supply shortage?)
2. I walked into my parent's kitchen, complaining that I didn't feel well and needed aspirin.
1. Johonna washed her uncooked hot dog quite thoroughly in her orange plastic cup of water.


7.08.2012

A Moment in Time

CONTRARY to popular belief*, the main reason I blog is to record all the stuff I don't want to forget. Before the blog I used to write notes to Luke as means of recording bits of our life.  In the rare event that I re-read these, my favorite parts are always about the really mundane things that were happening at that time in our life.  Like what I made for dinner that night, or what movie we were going to go see. 

So, even though it will not entertain anyone except myself about 4.46 years from now....

Right now it is scorching hot outside, but cool inside thanks to two strategically placed window AC units.  Baylor, 11 months, is crawling around chewing on an amazon gift card and playing with individually wrapped crackers and luna bars.  He uses them as skid plates under one or both hands to accelerate his crawling.  He is going to walk any minute now.  He is generally found destructing things, and he is making a giant mess of snacks right now. 

Jo has just gone potty and is now back to play catch with a red bouncy ball.  Her dad is throwing it at Baylor's head, and when it hits him, Baylor, Jo, and Luke laugh.  I am frowning in disapprovement but Baylor squeals with joy, so I guess the problem is all mine.  Oops, now he just opened the box of sidewalk chalk (inside), Luke's confiscating.

Luke's watching "locked up abroad" which I detest (it makes me anxious and never want to leave this country).  The kids have greasy looking hair because they were slathered in sunscreen today while we celebrated ash's bday at my parents. Baylor was happy as a clam to climb in and out of the kiddie pool about 150 consecutive times.  Johonna ate copious amounts of candy and we had smores bars for dessert.  Dad smoked ribs and the best chicken I've ever had.  Rucker ate the remainder of my smores bars on the ride back home, so I'm in a foul mood and not sure how I'll get my chocolate fix tonight. 

The house is clean (except the 2 dozen granola bars Baylor has evenly distributed throughout the living room) because we had 2 showings today.  One lady told Luke, "The house is perfect. I love it" so we'll see if that goes anywhere.  I don't like having to clean the house so often, but it is nice to have things picked up almost all the time.

Jo is pulling Baylor around by his shirt and yanking him in their room and slamming the door.  This should concern me, but I am just happy for the quiet.  I know it will end in tears and two giant bins of toys upended in their room, but it is a trade I'm willing to make. 

We just snuck outside to watch them through their window.  Jo is playing with a truck and Baylor is bending a book.  They caught us watching them and came to the window.  Now she's singing "the swimmers in the pool go round and round."  I'm sure we'll do the bed time battle in another 30 minutes, but for now the chaos is under control and everyone is content. 

*Popular belief: I blog as a socially acceptable way of talking about myself without having to listen to what anyone else has to say. I blog so I can brag about myself but sort of make it look like I'm not intending to. I blog so I can post flattering pictures of myself without having to show you the 92 pics I took in effort to get one good one. I blog so I can publicize how amazing my husband and children are. I [used to] blog about what an intelligent dog I have. 

7.07.2012

Monkeys

I remember when I was in high school there was a girl who, and I'm not kidding you, called her boyfriend "Simba."  He called her "Nala."  As in:


I was highly unimpressed.  I bet they wrote poems for each other too.  Gag.

Anyhow, Luke & I have never had any sort of ridiculous nicknames for each other.  Unless you consider the following to be nicknames:
Bovine (when I was pregnant)
Heifer (also while I was with child)
Food Wolverine (before, during, and after pregnancy)

  But you throw kids into the mix and any semblance of maturity goes out the window.

Which is why Luke calls Jo, "Little Monkey," and Jo calls Luke "Silverback." 
Luke's got a big head and nice arms, but I don't really see it.  The point is that "silverback" is like the boss hog of monkeys and I suppose that is where Luke draws the parallels.

Which brings me to the point of this blog.  Today at the park I was sitting by Jo on the play structure when a little boy climbed up near her.  She looked at him and her opening (and only) line was this:

"Hey KID. My dad's name is silverback."

I think that's the 3 year old version of "my dad's stronger than your dad."

And here's a pic of another monkey in the family.  He can't quite say "silverback" yet, so Da-Da will have to suffice for now.