Things people say

I come from a consolidated lineage of people who believe you must speak first (at any cost, in any circumstance) and evaluate the emotional, political, or social impacts of your statements later (if ever).  By consolidated lineage, I mean my mother & brother.  Here are a few recent gems:

Mom: You're not stressed about Sunday (birthday party for Jo)? What are you going to serve? 
Me: I don't know yet.
Mom: Well you know a guest in your house is like a precious jewel on a pillow.  They are to be treated with care.
Me: (silence)
Mom: Well I think Katie is my real daughter because she knows how to host a party.

Jack: You better be careful or your house is gonna look like a shitty antique store.

I returned my mom's phone call and she says: Oh hi. Listen. I'm going to make this quick because I'm standing at the fridge. Hold on.
Me: You're the slowest quick conversationalist I've ever met.
Mom: [snorts]

1 comment:

Kate said...

Haha I lobe you Karen!! :)